Limbo

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Living in limbo stinks.  It’s not that I mind waiting for things.  In fact, I think that I am pretty good at waiting.  That is the great thing about living so much in your head, you can entertain yourself pretty easily.  But limbo?  Not having the answers?  Ugh.  Samantha should hear from her #1 school, CNU, by Tuesday.  I feel confident that she will get in, but even if for some reason she didn’t, we can handle that.  I just want to know and am so ready to celebrate her acceptance!

Cancer is the ultimate limbo.  Not knowing from one week to the next what will happen.  Being in a state of constant questioning.  Maintaining a hopeful attitude while not getting a lot of positive reinforcement.  Feeling paralyzed to make long term plans because you are worried about treatment schedules and how he will be feeling that far away.  Dave’s bloodwork last week showed his CEA was up to 17 from 6 before he took his unplanned chemo break. This doesn’t change the plan of attack to begin chemo again on Wednesday.  It just means that we have more unexpected news and more unanswered questions.  The alternatives to limbo are cure/remission which is what we are praying, hoping and striving for or things not turning out well which is unthinkable.  So, we take it one day at a time and one step at a time and one bit of information at a time in our world.

xoxo

Robyn

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