Day #6 – Helpful Solutions

Image

I am grateful for this place.  It is the Life with Cancer Center.  We have been meeting with a counselor there who has years of experience working with colon cancer patients and their families.

For the last month or so I have been worrying about Dave’s working or more accurately Dave’s lack of working.  He has been in a bit of a slump – going in late or quite a few days not going in at all.  Each morning as the clock seems to bellow “look how late it is!”, my anxiety increases.  I’d like to say that I am the understanding wife who doesn’t say anything, but I do.  Every time.  We talked about my stress last night during counseling.  I am worried that when Dave doesn’t go to work that he is feeling worse than I am aware.  I am concerned that he is depressed when he stays home and sleeps a good part of the day.  And I fear that his bosses will try to move him out of his school into a different position.  When I have tried to talk to him about this, I imagine what he is hearing is something akin to the Charlie Brown teacher.

What I Say: If you sleep until noon/take a three hour hap, you are not going to be able to sleep tonight which means you are going to be tired in the morning.

What He Hears: Wanh wanh wanh wuh wahn.

What I Say: I think it’s a great idea for you to alter your work hours.  But then you have to try to follow that new schedule.

What He Hears:  Blah blah blah.  Nag nag nag.

I have been at a loss as to how to help him  (And let’s be honest, help my stress too.)  Last night, I asked our counselor for her advice.  Much of what she said to us was not new.  But he could HEAR it from her.  She suggested very specific sleeping parameters as far as hours per night and minutes per nap.  She talked to him about work and his schedule.   This morning he got up at his normal time and went to school.  This has only happened a couple of times in the last few weeks.  I am so so hopeful.  And so thankful.

xoxo

Robyn

5 thoughts on “Day #6 – Helpful Solutions

  1. Amen. … On Nov 6, 2013 9:46 PM, “embracingtherollercoaster” wrote:

    > embracingtherollercoaster posted: “I am grateful for this place. It > is the Life with Cancer Center. We have been meeting with a counselor > there who has years of experience working with colon cancer patients and > their families. For the last month or so I have been worrying about Dave’s > w”

  2. Robyn – I can’t begin to understand your stress level with dealing with the daily ups and downs. I do think this Cancer Center may well be better then all the treatments Dave has gone thru. They help with dealing with both sides of the cancer. They listen to you and Dave and seem to be making GREAT suggestions. Keep asking those very important questions for you to help understand and deal with this. Lots of Love!! A Friend Always

  3. Sounds like you have found a real fountain of knowledge with your counselor there. Care givers are in such a difficult position. God Bless you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s