When Dave was newly diagnosed and we began to understand the enormity of the situation, I remember thinking (praying?) if it is going to be awful, let it be fast. We have all heard the horror stories of lingering and suffering, and I didn’t want Dave to go through that.
It seems that in the last month things have begun to change at a rapid pace. He has slowed down. A lot. His appetite has been cut in half. The pain meds he needs in order to get through the day have quadrupled. This week has brought about several new issues – edema, jaundice and shortness of breath. So, I’d like to amend my prayer please don’t let him suffer, but please slow this down. It feels like we are turning a corner and what is around it is scary. He is weary. I am not ready.