1. There are some things that I wish you had taught me – how to use the grill, how to clean the fish tank, and your guacamole recipe. (The kids have asked several times about the last one.)
2. I swear I remember you ordering a little hand held vacuum for the cars. I cannot find it anywhere. Where did you hide it?
3. I had lunch with Jennifer from Gymboree playgroup days and more recently from Virginia Cancer Specialists. She told me that not only were you one of Dr. S’s favorite patients that you were also a favorite with many of the nurses because you were so positive. She said they were amazed that you would ask how they were doing and then remember details and ask follow up questions from visit to visit. I just smiled because that is exactly how you always were.
4. I have (re)connected with so many people in the last seven weeks – from our first days at Dranesville and throughout your career and life. You always said that I had no idea how big your circle was. I teased you, but you were right. i had no idea.
5. The kids and I went in and packed up your office. We brought home that amazing hawk painting from Kevin, the trolls, all your pictures, Jeff’s artwork. Tina gave me the framed picture of you in that crazy suit. I cried.
6. I drove by Reston Hospital and held my breath. Every place I go reminds me of you, but that was the toughest.
7. Your dog is doing okay. Fingers crossed he has no outward signs of being ill. I know he misses you. He has slowed down a bit, but he still seems content.
8. You would be so proud of our kids. They are incredibly strong and kind people. I think Grant could us your dad words right about now, but we are doing okay.
9. The kids and I watched The Parent Trap. Did you know our first dance song was in that movie? I saw a preview for a new movie coming out that I thought we would definitely want to see on a date night. I got excited for a second before I remembered.
10. I think of you every single morning when I wake up. Sometimes it is too overwhelming so I just get up and get going with the day. Other days I lie there and remember different moments and events during our lives together, and I feel peaceful.
I miss you, and I love you.