1. I have managed to keep all the animals alive and kicking. The extreme algae situation in the fish tank is finally under control. Remember when I said that crickets were the line I wouldn’t cross? I lied. I have been feeding your bearded dragon 25 large crickets every 3-4 days. It’s totally gross, but I do it. The vet says that Winnie is on “limited time” so we are doing everything to keep him comfortable and happy. I have been telling Parker that I like to think that when he goes, he will somehow end up with you. After all, he was your boy.
2. PopPop has been doing lots of driving with Grant. I have been doing some too, but I have to admit that I liked it better when you were in charge of the permit to license phase. You were always more patient and calm with this kind of stuff.
3. I have been carrying your wallet and watch in my purse since the hospital. I changed purses this weekend and slipped only your watch into the side pocket. It is comforting to me to have a little reminder of you with me all the time. I left your wallet in my old purse. Baby steps.
4. Sometimes I start to think about you, and I force my mind to shift to something else. 11 weeks is a long time, and you are starting to feel so very far away. There are times that I can’t let the memories come because it is too hard and makes me sad. I miss you every day, and I still can’t believe I won’t be able to feel the comfort of your arms around me or see your grinning face looking at me. I’d even take a spat over something stupid just to have another minute with you.
5. I am trying to stay positive and look for the good every day. Some days are easier than others but so far I think I have been able to find something to be grateful for each and every day. I hear your voice in my head cheering me on and reminding me that it’s going to be okay.
I love you and miss you so much.