It would be easy to rewrite history and idealize a 22 year relationship. The truth is that Dave and I butted heads on a pretty regular basis. That is what happens when two know-it-alls get together. Sometimes, most of the time, the issues were small and fairly ridiculous. Other times had one or both of us eyeing the door with consideration. Dave was impulsive. I over think things. Dave wasn’t much for thinking long term repercussions. I am not one who really throws caution to the wind. But at the end of the day, we always came out of whatever it was stronger. The strength in our relationship came from hard work and finding the right balance. From persevering through the tough times. And from keeping our focus on each other. After all, outside support always takes the side of one person or the other.
Now that my other half is physically gone, I try to honor what I have learned from him. I am determined to take the best of each of us and apply it to my life. Sometimes this means pushing myself out of my comfort zone. Other times it means looking at situations through a different lens. During the toughest moments I consider, “What would Dave think?” Early in the summer I was struggling with an issue in which I wondered if I was overreacting or being too sensitive. As I contemplated aloud what Dave would want me to do, Sam knew the answer. He had shared with her some very specific opinions and thoughts. I felt stronger in my resolve and relieved to be doing right by him.
He is with me. In my dreams. In my decision making. Forever in my head and my heart.