I read Lisa’s comment on my last post and was struck by the idea that she interpreted it that Parker was talking about me when she mentioned “a parent who has overcome it”. Then I read Lora’s comment and realized that maybe they were on to something. I took Parker’s comment to mean that Dave was not able to overcome cancer and go into remission or cure mode. At some point during the car ride, we did talk about remission and that even that brings its own challenges.
But Lisa and Lora’s comments did give me pause to think. Parker hasn’t had a parent overcome it. I started to wonder what that might look like or if that ever really happens. We all talk about Dave. We certainly laugh about lots of different memories. Sometimes we talk about the tough times and sometimes there are tears. Is there a point where you move on from that? I worry that overcoming might look like forgetting.
Cancer beat us. It took Dave away. Cancer won that battle. That I accept, I guess. Though in its wake, although we have been left a bit shellshocked and weathered, we have also emerged stronger than ever. I can honestly say that I am not the same person I was a year ago or two years ago. I would hate to think that we went through all of this to come out on the other side having learned nothing.
I am not sure how any of us; patient, family, or even survivor can truly overcome cancer. It is a powerful beast. But thank you, my friends, for showing me another point of view. You have definitely given me a lot to think about. I’ll let you know if I figure anything out.